Reality Check: Your football is not real football

Football to the majority of the world means football. To those in this country and our neighbors to the north, we are forced to refer to football as soccer. If we dare use the term football to mean a game played mainly with one’s feet, most will be utterly confused and others will possibly become irate.

American football as the world knows it is the game where the ball spends more time in a player’s hands than it does on the ground being played with the feet. Americans who love the original football more than the American game called football can thank the ego-driven Walter Camp for stealing the term from the world’s game and forcing those in the States to use the slang term soccer for a sport that was created long before oversized men carrying a pigskin were crashing into one another.

How about next time when you create a sport you come up with a more original name. Make it a name that is actually representative of the sport. Sorry but a football is actually a round thing you kick with your feet so that term was stolen too.

While it’s rather insulting to steal the name football from the world’s game, the most unsettling thing about it is the genuine disgust that most Americans have toward the game. It is as though the name was simply taken for an American-born sport because many in the States could not grasp the game’s intricacies and saw that they would be inferior to the world, and as we all know, the U.S. cannot play second fiddle to anyone.

So instead of trying to play catch up, America took the easy way out and created its own game, stole the name of the world’s most popular sport, and then began to profit from it. During all of this, many in the States despise real football and will criticize it without hesitation. Unfortunately, these people know very little about the game and thus misconceptions are created so I will now give you American football loving, football (soccer for those of you who are still lost) hating people a reality a check.

Complaints about real football or as you prefer, soccer:

1. Why can’t they score more?

While the game may appear very low scoring because there are games where there may only be one or two goals, possibly none, compare it to football. A 28-14 football score is like a 4-2 soccer score. The only reason it looks like there’s not enough scoring is due to six points being given for a touchdown. If they only gave one point for a touchdown, scores in soccer would rival that of football. In soccer there are also typically the same amount of opportunities to score as there are in a football game. In both sports, teams will on average have about a handful of quality scoring chances every game; the worse the match-up, the greater the opportunity for the better team have more chances and blow their opponent out. Yes, winning 3-0 (or by 21 points) is a blow out, and it does happen soccer.

1a. You can tie!

It is possible to tie in football. Take a look back at the history of the game and they were not all that uncommon. Over time, rules committees have implemented ways to create more opportunities to score so that ties wouldn’t happen. Overtime and two-point conversions have appeared to remedy the situation, but is it so bad to have teams tie? It just means that the two teams were evenly matched on the given day. Also, look at the various amounts given for scores. You can receive two, three, six, seven, or eight points depending on how you have scored. In soccer, a goal is a goal, and you will always only receive one point for that. There’s nothing wrong with keeping it simple.

2. Their fans are violent.

Ever seen a drunk, hostile crowd at a football game? It can look eerily similar to the crowd at a European football match. For a good example of how out of control a crowd can get, just look at Philly where they once pelted Santa Claus with snowballs at an Eagles game. Was that really necessary?

3. This game is so slow it’s putting me to sleep.

Soccer is fast. You’re just not in-tune enough with the game to realize it. The ball is moving the majority of the match, it is just not always moving forward. Ever seen a football game where the ball is constantly moving? Of course not. It’s impossible with all of the stoppages that have to occur. Soccer is a game about strategy and knowing how to be patient and pick your spots. If you pay attention, watch for quick passing combinations when teams are most dangerous. When players are linking up in succession down the field, it’s an art form. Build-ups in soccer are far more exciting than what goes on between when a ball is hiked and when it is caught by a receiver.

3a. I have to sit through 45 minutes of this before they stop?

Have we really gotten so lazy that we can’t watch something for 45 minutes straight? I’m positive that you watch roughly the same amount of time in commercials during your football games. Honestly, I’d rather watch 90 solid minutes of action compared to maybe 30 minutes of action with stoppages after every play. If every team decided to go no-huddle maybe it would make games a little more interesting. Then again, I couldn’t see 300-pound linemen running for that long without stopping so that’s one dream that will never come true.

4. Where’s the contact?

Believe it or not, but there’s plenty of contact to go around. When players are crashing into one another, occasionally at full-speed, and wearing very little padding, outcomes can be disastrous. Serious injuries aren’t out of the ordinary. Horrifying scenes do occur. While football has its share of serious injuries, take a look at a game that provides little protection for one’s body. Fractured skulls from heads clashing for balls in the air, shattered kneecaps and ankles, flesh being gashed open by studs, and limbs being snapped like twigs are injuries that can make even the biggest football fans become squeamish. Just because there isn’t repeated contact doesn’t mean there isn’t any.

5. What’s with all of the acting?

Not all players dive. Most play the game the right way, but those who don’t (primarily the Italians) give the game a bad name. It’s something FIFA is trying to get rid of, but it’s a judgment call. Players do it because what’s good for them is good for them, not what’s good for the game. It’s a dirty ploy, but one that does work. And as long as players like Cristiano Ronaldo continue diving and rolling around on the pitch in an attempt to win an Oscar, players will do it. Just get used to it.

There it is. Your reality check about the world’s game. Real football.